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However, pick your moments and decide if you want to be a parental figure or a friend.Either way, you need to keep the communication loop open with your boyfriend and for many decisions, the ex-wife too, so as to be able to be a part of the complicated equation.And you only have to inch a li’l closer to the kids and she will leap forth into the heat of the situation.
From those intermittent calls for checking up on the kids to regularly making plans for pick-ups or drop-offs and filling her in about anything that happened when her kids were at your place, you’d have to be ready for smooth communication and an agreeable level of willingness to get along.
In the process, some unpleasant and challenging emotions may surge within you and you should be prepared to deal with them.
And if those li’l chirpy people are always about him, there are high chances that the mommy is floating somewhere in the background too, right? Of course, there’s a flip side (like with everything else in life) and some of them might give you the feeling like they’re in it for picking a new mom for their kids at the supermarket and have an ingrained tact of wrecking it all – but how’d you know unless you gauge his ways of loving, his approach toward commitment, and his sense of responsibility, right?
Not only would you be with someone who is unlikely to rush into things, is in it for the long haul, has immense patience, can keep his composure, is a parent and therefore, on his way to a heightened degree of selflessness, but you’d also be with someone who knows what it takes to make a relationship work.
Instead, if he alters his plan with them to make plans with you, THAT is a red flag.